


He Doesn't Kiss Me Any More

by Castiel_in_Drag



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol, Angst with a Happy Ending, Big Brother Gabriel, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Roller Coaster, Emotionally Hurt Castiel, Fluff and Angst, Fluffy Ending, M/M, Mpreg, No Sex, Pregnancy, Pregnant Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-04
Updated: 2016-12-03
Packaged: 2018-09-06 08:17:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8742112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Castiel_in_Drag/pseuds/Castiel_in_Drag
Summary: Castiel turns up at his brother’s, dishevelled and drunk because he believes Dean is leaving him.  Gabriel comforts him until Dean arrives the next day to tell the real reason he’s been so distant  [Hint is in the tags].
Just a mildly angsty, majorly fluffy fic with a happy-ending (of course!).  Castiel has some negative thoughts but nothing really trigger-warning-worthy.





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> So the logistics of mpreg is something that has always bothered me. For this fic, I’ve just ignored all known logic so just assume men and women have both forms of genitals or something. Dean had a dick. Castiel has a dick. Both had equal chance of getting pregnant. I don’t really know. Just go with it, okay?!! And don’t think about it too hard ‘cause I sure try not to (I find it just angers me). Ok. Enough babbling. Enjoy. Talk to you brave souls on the other side.

Gabriel opened the door to his apartment to reveal his younger dishevelled-looking brother on the other side.  His hair was in disarray and his suit was missing its usual tie.  His trench coat hung half-way off his shoulders.  Deep blue shadows coated the under of his eyes and his skin was unhealthily pale.  He immediately recoiled from the stench of stale alcohol his brother was obviously sweating off him.  He moved aside as Castiel crashed through the door and flopped onto the saggy blue couch.

 

“Cassie?” Gabriel asked, shutting the door with a frown.  “Isn’t Dean supposed to be home right now?  What are you doing _here_?”

 

Castiel rolled over onto his side so he could scowl at Gabriel, the effect of which was ruined by his unfocused eyes and sloppy appearance.  Gabriel watched as he reached into the recess of his dirty trench-coat and pulled out a half bottle of whiskey.  Acting fast, Gabriel darted forward and snatched it from his hands before he could unscrew the lid though.  Castiel made a protesting whine and made grabby hands for it like an unhappy toddler robbed of his milk.

 

“Ah-ah,” admonished Gabriel, waggling his finger.  “You can have it back when you tell me what’s wrong, Cassie.”

 

Castiel pouted and then to Gabriel’s absolute horror, his bottom lip began to tremble.  Huffing, Castiel rolled over so his back was to Gabriel and began to shake a little.  Gabriel stood uncertainly in the middle of his own living-room while he watched his brother pretend not to cry.  After a moment’s hesitation, he shuffled over and flopped on to the floor next to him, reaching up to rub hopefully soothing circles between his brother’s shoulders.

 

“Come on, Cassie,” wheedled Gabriel, keeping his voice soothing.  “Tell me what happened.  Did you lose your job?  Your wallet?  Your lunch?”

 

The answer came back barely audible.  “ _Dean_.  I lost Dean.”

 

Gabriel’s movements paused, his thoughts faltered. What!  No way.  Dean was crazy about his brother, god knows why.  Gabriel tried to chuckle but it came out more like a huff of breath.  Joking was the only way Gabriel could think of to respond.  He wasn’t good at this emotional stuff.  “How did you manage to lose an adult man?  Especially one that size, Cassie.”

 

Castiel sat up suddenly and pushed his brother away.  He put his head in his hands and shuddered.  Gabriel’s heart stuttered in his chest, hating that he had to see his brother so distressed.  It reminded him to much of when Castiel would come home having been teased merciless by the other kids in his school.  By the time Castiel had been starting high school, Gabriel was already finished and it wasn’t as if he could hang around a public school watching kids to see who the bullies were.  Gabriel had felt so helpless.  The school had been no help since the bullies never left any physical evidence.

 

However that had all changed in sophomore year when _Dean_ had transferred to Castiel’s class.  Suddenly Castiel wasn’t the loner kid any more.  Dean, even at sixteen, was intimidating and charming.  Any fight he couldn’t talk himself out of, he won with his fists.  For whatever reason Gabriel never understood, Castiel had managed to woo the new kid and soon he was too much trouble for the bullies to bother with. 

 

“You know how Dean went to visit Sam down in California?” croaked Castiel finally, still avoiding Gabriel’s eye.  “He was supposed to be there for a week but two days ago, he called saying he needed more time ‘ _to think about some things’_ and that we’d ‘ _talk’_ when he got back.”

 

Gabriel frowned, ignoring the adorable air quotes his brother used and considered his brother’s words.  “That’s all?  Cassie, sweet Cassie, you’re just being paranoid.  Dean’s not-”

 

“ _No_!” Castiel shouted, effectively cutting Gabriel off. He stood up and began to pace, raking his fingers through his hair desperately.  “It’s the _way_ he said it, Gabe.  Before he left, he’d been withdrawn and distant.  _And don’t you dare call me crazy, Gabe_. There was a ton of things like… H-he had been sick before he left and he didn’t let me comfort him; he _always_ cuddles when he’s sick.  He’s like some weird-infected-germ-ridden-octopus.  And _then_ he wouldn’t eat what I cooked _and_ he stopped letting me hold him at night _and_ we haven’t slept together in about _two_ _months_ which is the _longest_ we have _ever_ gone without it, _even in high school_.  He even refused me when I _got on my kne-_ ”

 

“ _Stop_!” yelled Gabriel.  “I do _not_ need to hear about your sex life!”

 

“That’s the problem, Gabriel.  We _don’t have one anymore_!” growled Castiel, turning on his brother.  “He never willingly kisses me anymore; I _always_ have to initiate it.”

 

Gabriel shut his eyes and fought to calm his temper.  He didn’t need to snap at his brother.  That would just make things worse, even if his brother was some paranoid crazed idiot.  He didn’t think for a second that what his brother had said was reason for Dean leaving him.  Okay, it sounded like they were having problems but Dean wouldn’t just give up.  He knew how much Dean and Castiel meant to each other. 

 

“Look, Cas,” sighed Gabriel.  “You’re drunk and obviously sleep-deprived so why don’t you sleep in the guest bedroom tonight.  I can promise you’ll feel better.”

 

“No, I want to drink,” snapped Cas, snatching the bottle of whiskey from Gabriel’s slack grip.

 

Before Gabriel could stop him, he had whipped the cap off and was downing it.  He held Gabriel back easily with one hand and not for the first time, Gabriel cursed his height.  Deciding a different tactic was needed, Gabriel stepped back and waited for his brother to begin to lower his arm before launching himself at him.  They both fell, limbs tangled, both wrestling for the mostly empty bottle.  Gabriel gained the upper hand and held the bottle out of reach. Castiel elbowed him in the stomach and dug his nails into the back of his brother’s neck.  Recoiling and writhing away from the pain, Gabriel dropped the bottle and cringed at the sound of glass hitting solid bone.

 

Gabriel rolled off immediately, instantly apologetic.  Castiel clutched his face, releasing an expletive of curses.  Gabriel leapt to his feet and sprinted to the freezer to grab the first thing he saw (a bag of baby carrots).  He thrust them at his brother who took them gratefully.  They both sat on the floor with their backs leaning against the couch in stunned silence until Castiel glanced over and saw Gabriel watching him worriedly.  He began to chuckle which quickly dissolved into hysterical laughter as Gabriel joined in.   

 

When the laughter tapered off, Gabriel stood and heaved his brother to his feet.  “Look Cas, for what it’s worth, I don’t think Dean’s going to leave you.  You guys may have some issues that you should talk about maybe but Dean loves you, like fight-Heaven-and-Hell-for-you-and-everything-in-between loves you, and those feelings don’t just disappear.  Talk with him when he gets back and make it work.”

 

Surprisingly Castiel didn’t hit him and instead yanked him into a tight hug.  “Thanks, big brother,” he whispered. 

 

Gabriel answered by squeezing his brother tighter.  “Any time, baby brother.”

 

                                                                *****************************

 

Gabriel woke to a pounding on his door.  He groaned, rolling to his feet.  People _really_ needed to stop bothering him while he was sleeping.  He passed the guest room and peeked in at his sleeping brother.  After their big heart to heart, Gabriel had insisted Castiel shower before sleeping so, and quote, “he wouldn’t smell the house out like a brewery” which Castiel had reluctantly agreed to. 

 

Fighting a yawn, Gabriel opened his door to reveal his brother-in-law dressed in sweat pants and a baggy hoodie with his fist raised ready to knock again.  He watched Dean slowly lower his hand and rubbed the back of his neck subconsciously.  Not for the first time, Gabriel wondered how his brother had managed to hit the jackpot so damn easily.  Even though Gabriel wasn’t interested in men that way, even he could appreciate the attractive features of Dean Winchester’s impossibly symmetrical face. 

 

“Hey, Gabe, you seen Cas around?” Dean asked.  “He’s not answering his phone or…  _CAS_?!”

 

Gabriel found himself pushed aside as Dean fought his way into the room.  He marched straight over to his husband who had obviously just woken up and tilted his face toward the light in order to inspect his battered face.  A large ugly bruise coloured purple, green and yellow decorated the area under his right eye.  _Yeah, Castiel had definitely over-reacted when he said Dean didn’t love him anymore_ , thought Gabriel spitefully. 

 

“Dean,” whimpered Cas, wrapping his arms around his husband only to be pushed away.  Castiel tried not to let the hurt show but it shone through his eyes.  “Why are you here?  Why didn’t you say you were coming home?  _Why won’t you let me touch you anymore_?”

 

Gabriel swallowed at how his baby brother’s voice cracked in the middle of that sentence.  He scurried to his bedroom, grabbed some clothes and ran out of the apartment without looking back.  That was too much angst and drama for him.  He’d go get breakfast at Kali’s.


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Gabriel has fled and Dean and Cas have their fluffy heart to heart. This is Castiel's POV since Gabriel's gone.

“Why are you here?  Why didn’t you say you were coming home?  _Why won’t you let me touch you anymore_?” Castiel whimpered, his voice breaking pitifully.

 

“Oh, _Cas_ ,” whispered Dean, rubbing his hands reassuringly up and down his husband’s arms.  “Please, look at me.”

 

Reluctantly, Cas tore his eyes away from the Stanford logo on Dean’s hoodie (He must have stolen it from Sam, considering how baggy it was) and met Dean’s glorious green eyes.  They glimmered and shone with unshed tears.  Castiel could feel his heart aching in his chest.  He didn’t want Dean to cry.  That meant Dean wasn’t happy and if Dean wasn’t happy then…

 

“Cas, what happened to your face?” Dean asked carefully.

 

“Gabriel hit me with a bottle while we were wrestling,” Castiel said quietly, his eyes dropping away from Dean’s again, this time in shame.

 

“And why were you wrestling?” Dean’s tone was patient but worry shone through in his voice.

 

“He thought I was drunk enough,” Castiel admitted, wanting nothing more for Dean to pull him into his arms and just hold him. 

 

“ _Cas_ ,” sighed Dean, his hand cupping his husband’s scruffy jaw.  “Why were you drunk?”

 

Castiel felt tears begin to fall from his eyes.  He couldn’t help it.  He was going to lose Dean.  He was going to lose the most precious wonderful thing in his miserable plain life.  He couldn’t imagine waking up in the morning and not seeing Dean wrapped up in his arms.  He couldn’t imagine ever coming home to an empty house and not having anyone to cook for.  Ever since college, Dean and Castiel had shared a house and a bed.  He didn’t know how to survive without Dean.  He couldn’t fix his car when it wouldn’t start in the morning.  He didn’t know what to do when the internet crashed.  He didn’t understand how to tax their car or how to not buy everything in the grocery store without Dean to stop him.

 

“I thought you weren’t coming back.  That you were just thinking of a way to let me down easy,” Castiel cried.  He fell to his knees suddenly unable to stand anymore.  God, he was so weak.  So pitiable.  “Please don’t leave me, Dean.  I need you.  I love you.  You’re my family.”

 

“Cas,” gasped Dean, dropping to his knees too.  He grabbed Castiel’s face and forced him to look at him.  “Cas, I could never, not ever, leave you.  I love you too.  I need you, just as much as you need me.”

 

Castiel cried harder.  “B-but you don’t act like it anymore.  You won’t let me hold you.  You won’t kiss me.  _You_ _don’t_ _love_ _me_.”  


“Castiel Winchester-Novak, you look at me right now,” Dean said sternly.  Castiel meekly obeyed.  He could never refuse Dean.  Dean’s face was just as tear-stained as his felt but there was a righteous anger that burned in his eyes.  “Castiel.  I’m not leaving you.  I will _never_ leave you.   _Ever_.  I do love you and you don’t get to tell me that I don’t.”

 

Castiel pouted.  “Then why are you so distant and _cold_ and _aloof_ and _withdrawn_ and- and-”

 

Dean shushed him with a gentle kiss that shut him right up.  “I had stuff I needed to think about, Cas.  I told you that.  That’s why I stayed longer in California.”

 

“What stuff?  Why couldn’t you work it out next to me?” Castiel mumbled so unbearably self-conscious.  He was so weak and stupid, no wonder Dean didn’t want to be around him. 

 

Dean huffed and ordered Castiel to look at him.  Castiel slowly raised his eyes to meet Dean’s but panicked when Dean moved away.  Dean chuckled and shushed him again.  Slowly, ever so slowly, Dean pulled his baggy hoodie up to expose his stomach.  His usually flat and toned stomach was rounded and slightly distended.  Castiel frowned.  Was Dean sick?  Was that a tumour?  Why was- Oh.  _Oh_.  _OH_.

 

“You’re- You’re-…” croaked Castiel, shuffling forwards to cup his husband’s belly reverently.  “You’re carrying our child?”

 

Dean nodded, tears beginning to fall again but the wide smile on his face told Castiel they were happy tears.  “About three months, the doc says.”

 

“Oh, Dean,” Castiel murmured, pulling him close and kissing his lips lightly.  “ _Why didn’t you tell me_?”

 

“I don’t know. I guess I was worried how you’d react and to be honest, I wasn’t sure how I felt about it, Cas.  Pregnancy is dangerous, people die every day from it.  It’s invasive and you have to sacrifice a lot, not just alcohol and coffee and fatty foods but time and your own autonomy.  It so unjustly expensive to just even _birth_ the kid then you’ve got the next eighteen-plus years to feed and clothe it.  I guess that I was just worried I wouldn’t be up to the challenge.”  Dean’s voice was barely a whisper by the time he finished.

 

Castiel’s heart seized.  Dean was right, there was so many risks.  He could haemorrhage out, get sepsis or contract a Healthcare Associated Infection and that was just from the birth.  Dean was at risk of diabetes, high blood pressure, strokes and varicose veins and those were just the things Castiel knew from the top of his head.

 

Castiel had heard recently that over 600 people died from childbirth every year just in the US.  How was Castiel supposed to protect him from all that?  How could Castiel protect him from Mother Nature?  But _oh_ \- Castiel was missing the bigger picture

 

Castiel nuzzled Dean’s neck.  “I’m guessing that since you’re telling me that you want to keep it?”

 

“Yeah, if that’s okay with you.  You’re the father, Cas.  You get a choice in this too.”

 

“It’s your body, Dean.  Whatever you decide, I trust you,” whispered Castiel pecking Dean’s lips.  “But I do have to admit I’m glad that you’re willing to do this.  I’m going to love our child so much, Dean.”

 

Dean chuckled nervously and tried to pull away (it was useless though because Castiel wasn’t ever going to let go again).  Castiel tightened his hold and made a questioning noise.  He just wanted Dean _close_.  After all the distance between them, Castiel just needed to hold his husband tight and just _be_ with him. 

 

“It’s, eh, more like _children_ , Cas,” Dean smiled, although his eyes betrayed his worry that this might be a deal breaker for Castiel.  _As if_. 

 

Castiel’s eyes grew wide and he swallowed thickly.  “Children?”

 

Dean nodded shyly.  “Twins, actually.”

 

Castiel’s lips parted and before he even knew it himself, he was pushing his lips insistently against his husband’s lips, demanding entrance.  Two months was far too long to go without sex with his beautiful sexy _pregnant_ husband.

 

Dean gasped excitedly and wormed a hand between their bodies to squeeze Castiel’s hardening cock suggestively.  “I take it that you’re happy that your swimmers are so strong, Cas.”

 

“Oh, I’ll show you how strong they are,” growled Castiel.  He stood and picked Dean up so his legs wrapped around his waist.  He grunted slightly because Dean was already a little too heavy to carry.  He carried him into Gabriel’s spare room and turned as he fell onto the bed so that he wouldn’t crush Dean and his pregnant belly.

 

Dean just laughed.  “You’re not going to be able to do that without hurting yourself for a while, Cas.  I’m going to get so _fat;_ especially with _twins_.”

 

“That’ll just mean more of you to love,” whispered Castiel, nipping Dean’s neck, wanting to mark his husband up and claim him.  “You’re beautiful, Dean.  Pregnant or not.”

 

Dean chuckled and pulled Castiel into a deep kiss.  Castiel’s heart squeezed.  His chest felt so full of love that it would burst.  Dean wasn’t leaving him.  Dean was staying and raising a family with him.  Dean was _pregnant_. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that’s all she wrote, folks. Hope you liked it. Those pregnancy facts are real and are cause for serious concern. My country is currently fighting to instate any family planning legislation at all. The 600 women dying in the USA is a real statistic but I didn’t research it too heavily so it may differ mildly. Who knows! Anyway. Pro-choice! Fuck the patriarchy! END.

**Author's Note:**

> So there's the angst. Next chapter has the fluff!


End file.
